I've been trying to find the words to describe how I've been feeling since leaving Ghana and transitioning to life as I know it, and honestly, Ghana has f*#@!% me up----in a good way.
I know when I'm passionate about something because it consumes my mind completely. It's all I talk about, think about, want to do, etc. It's safe to say that I'm passionate about studying abroad and traveling in general.
Since my return, I find myself disengaging more with other people at school. Not that I ever cared about the same things, but now it's even more evident, and that's okay.
I didn't even want to come back to school LOL: https://youtu.be/Tis0QxWyX0s
Thoughts to myself: So what do you care about Christina? Take the time to explore more of those things and expand on them.
It's Year 2 of college and I'm surrounded around a lot of a lot that I could care less about. Things these kids look forward to, I've already experienced and I'm ready for the next experience. No I'm not a Debbie downer--I just don't care. It feels good to finally be able to distinguish the two.
I'm gaining clarity on the career path I want to go down and it's also consuming me in a good way. The fire inside me, this flame that has been dim for the past year and a half is finally growing.
I criticize a lot when in comes to this country. We are so selfish. We have too much. We need to be nicer to each other.
I haven't been blogging as much as I've been wanting to because my thoughts are really the only thing I have left to myself. I'm also learning to just get what I want to get out out and let go of this perfectionism.
I prioritize me. I stopped going out because it doesn't better me in any way and it's not my idea of "fun".
I talk to God a lot more. I read my bible a lot more. I listen to sermons a lot more. (Crazy Faith series - Transformational Church) is currently blowing my mind.
The good news is, I'm only 19.
Lately a lot of people have been saying that to me. "You're young, you're only 19, you have time." It use to annoy the hell out of me but I finally get it now.
I'M ONLY 19. Why do I have this sense of urgency to have everything figured out and want to see everything all at once!?
I'll just go ahead and answer my own question: because that's me which isn't a bad thing, but I'm learning how to slow down and take my time. How to use analyzation instead of impulsiveness.
May we all figure out our lives one day at a time in peace.
Lord knows I'm figuring out mine.