Insecurities


in·se·cu·ri·ty /ˌinsəˈkyo͝orədē/ uncertainty or anxiety about oneself; lack of confidence.

Insecurities, we all have them. But I realized that my insecurities were the result of me caring way too much of what people thought of me. Even projecting their own insecurities on me.


So we will go down the list about my insecurities and why they aren't valid anymore.


My forehead.


I have a very wide forehead. Wider than average lol. Growing up my family members would always touch it and I would never see what they were talking about. But one day I noticed. From that day on I would always make sure that my hairstyles had some type of hair in the front of my head to hide my forehead as much as possible. I felt like having a big forehead made me ugly.


In middle school I had a teacher who also had a wide forehead. Not big, but wide like mine. She wore her hair back everyday and let her forehead show. Yes, my classmates talked about it and pointed it out but she was so comfortable in herself that she didn't care. So one day I decided to wear my hair back and I got soo many compliments on it that day. One of my classmates told me "Damn Christina I didn't realize you had such a big forehead.", but I didn't care. That was the day I realized I never really cared, I just let others impose that insecurity on me. Either way I still turn heads. Besides what am I going to do, get forehead surgery? (I've heard it's actually a thing).



My butt.


In a time where being "thick" has taken over, I definitely do not fit the term. My butt is flat as a pancake lol maybe a little fluffier. My 15 year old sister -- hell, my brother has a bigger butt than me! I guess the booty gene just skipped me. The beauty of this insecurity is that I can build one whenever I decide to be serious about the gym. There's times where I wish my booty would pop out some in a certain dress, but obviously I don't care enough because I haven't worked for it yet!



My edges.


"Edges on fleek" yea that's not me. My edges grow different. They start at a point, then stop, then grow again. The empty space between can be mistaken for a bald spot, but that's just how they've always grown, so what am I gonna do about that? It's not even that noticeable unless someone is doing my hair.



My weight/body


This one is a little harder because it's one I still battle daily, a lot of factors go into, and can admit that it is my biggest insecurity. So this one is valid, but I'm learning how to love my body in the stage that it's in currently instead of the stage it was in or wants to be. It's okay that I weigh more now than last year, or the year before that. It's okay that my thighs touch, that I have back rolls and side pudge because I'm working on it and I'm not the only one in the world with these things. It's easy for people like family members to get in our heads a lot when it comes to this issue, but it's important to know what you want and how you feel. I have seen big girls be so confident, beautiful, and secure in themselves despite this world's common perception of body size & I love it.




What if we thought about our flaws, as not "flaws" necessarily, but things that we don't embrace enough. Dive into your "insecurities" and really see if you actually care about them, or if others have altered your perception of yourself.




Love Always,


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